You wax poetic about things pathetic as long as you look so cute.

So, one of my regulars was looking for some books and the internet catalog told him they were "available in CHECKED OUT". I hate our online catalog so very much.
***
Billboard October 21

• All kinds of country on the cover.
• Also, this headline:
• "Menudo's New Beginning"
• Which is almost as terrifying as Eddie Murphy and Scary Spice together.
• Which I didn't know about until Tiff informed me today.
• So, uh, thanks Tiff.
• I guess.
• Gah! Barry Manilow in a sequined jumpsuit!
• It's kind of weird that Tower Records are closing, but I was actually never that big a Tower fan.
• I don't know--is there even one in Pittsburgh?
• Was it a closed town, more or less, in the National Record Mart days?
• Menudo are going to have a tv show.
• Wow, Ricky Martin had some cheekbones.
• Aw, Mountain Goats.
• Insound didn't have a digital store 'til now?
• I always just assumed they did.
• I ♥ promo items: here's a condom whose wrapper says "I promote records and save lives."
• That's pretty damn sweet.
• Hee, Robbie Williams in a track suit.
• Poor Robbie--he's the opener to an article entitled "Famous Everywhere Else".
• And here's a scruffy Ricky Martin, who is being honored for his work with children.
• You know, in case you were wondering, I am planning on actually writing real blog posts at some point in the future. I'm just in a bit of a lull right now.
• I'm assuming everyone else knew that Johnny Marr was a Modest Mouse now.
• Before he went Electronic?
• And Dinosaur Jr have reunited as well.
• I suppose I have to order Diddy's new album for the library.
• I wonder if I can make Marissa order it?
• And Sarah McLachlan's releasing a Christmas album.
• Marr looks pretty adorable in this picture right here. I couldn't find the picture online, but you're welcome to look for yourself if you'd like.
• There's no back page on this issue. Looks like someone's removed the advertisement cover.

They're foxy to me. Are they foxy to you?

Billboard October 14

• mmmm, I made this tasty soup last night. I brought some for lunch today.
• Only problem is, I got a new can opener and it really sucks, so it took a lot longer than it should have to get the chicken stock from the can to the pot.
• So, My Chemical Romance is on the cover.
• And, as I'm sure everyone has realized by now, there's a pretty vocal 16yrold mall goth girl inside me.
• I'm not going to apologize for it and, more importantly, I think it really gives me an edge in the whole teen librarianing game.
• But it also means I have a fondness for things like Emily Strange, goth loli Japanese girls, and My Chemical Romance's ridiculous new single.
• You know, "The Black Parade"?
• Plus, you know how I love ridiculous musical messes.
• So I'm pretty happy they're on the cover.
• Also, this is apparently the top 20 women in music issue.
• woooo.
• Oh, and because it's not a Billboard post lately without a discussion of the Killers' attractiveness or lack thereof, I have to mention that I saw them on SNL this weekend. The singer was very much reminding me of that boy I made out with that I mentioned he sometimes looks like. It was nice.
• Plus, he was rocking the nerdy glasses/plaid button-down shirt combo I'm a sucker for during the new single.
• Then there was a costume change that invited badness, so the less said about that the better.
• Wait, who in Jet died?
• The new Beck album won't be on the UK's chart listing because it "contains cover art and packaging that give it an 'unfair advantage.'" Hunh?
• That doesn't make any damn sense.
• Dave Navarro is wearing an ugly cowboyish hat that has a tag on the front saying, DirtBag.
• Classy.
• I opted to not read the My Chemical Romance article.
• I skimmed and figured it would take all the fun out of the band.
• Twisted Sister are the special feature in this issue.
• This issue sure does seem to have a lot of specialness about it.
• My favorite thing about Twisted Sister is that Behind the Music where Dee Snyder talks about how he started a band to stay off drugs.
• He started a band pretty heavily influenced, at least image-wise, by the New York Dolls--
• --to stay off drugs.
• Something about that just doesn't make sense to me.
• I wonder why?
• ♥♥♥♥
• (One of my patrons just showed me how to make hearts. I'me very entertained now.)
• "Every metalhead in the world is going to want the new Christmas album as a Christmas present."
• That seems a bit redundant, no?
• Surely, there must have been a better way for Eddie Kramer to express himself.
• You'll notice I'm avoiding the terrifying notion of a Twisted Sister Christmas album.
• ...and now I can't get "We're Not Gonna Take It" out of my head.
• Oh, no one in Jet died; it was their dad.
• Which is sad.
• However, I still pretty much can't stand them.
• The End.
• Nick Rhodes is 6 Qestions.
• And he's talking about Second Life!!
• Which I keep meaning to blog about, but haven't yet.
• Apparently, Duran Duran have quite the Second Life presence.
• Also, the magazine refers to it as a "virtual reality game", which is nice considering the way libraries and yPulse keep talking about it.
• But that's a whole 'nother PoBaL.
• I hate to say it, but Joan is looking very plasticy and botoxed in this picture here.
• It's frightening.
• Anyone ever notice how much Miss Jay looks like Nile Rodgers?
• Oh, I'm mad at the CW for not repeating ANTM on Sunday nights around here. I work til 8 on Wednesdays!

I've been cataloging and labeling for days now.

I've moved to Blogger Beta. I may be updating the links and messing about with things. I haven't decided yet.
Mostly, I moved because Beta has tags, and, like the good little librarian I am, I want to be able to categorize every little part of my life.
Just think of this post as the key.

Billboard * boys * cheap plastic toys * comics * Craftiness *
emails clearing house * family * Fashion * general nerdiness * hair issues * holidays * In the Year 2000 * Junior/Buddy * Librarianing * Memory Lane * metaPoBaL * movies * movies * nonBillboard random * nonteenlit * politics * public transportation * relocation * Reviewing * stuff about me * Teenlit * television * the jerks * thrifting * travelogue

Like any classification system, it's pretty imperfect. (LC Subject Headings aren't all-encompassing and conclusive!? Heresy!) But, you know, it'll help people skip over the crap they don't want to read.

I'm hungry.

Thanks to everyone who made attempts to cheer me up on MySpace. I'm having a better day today. I also feel the need to mock Shane some more, because he replied to my "I'm having a crummy day" with "I read that without the R," to which I was forced (FORCED! I tell you.) to respond with, If I hand't needed the R, I wouldn't be in such a shitty mood.
There's like a cat hair, or Lamb's Pride Bulky mohair shedding, or bit of my own hair in my eye. It's probably my own hair. This always happens when I part my hair more over the the side than usual, and it's been worse since that last hair cut where the bitch obviously didn't care where I parted my hair, because they lied to me about her experience with curly hair.
Anyway, you might not have guessed it, but this is the post for Billboard September 30. And I really am hungry. I forgot to bring a snack today.

• Goddam, now that hair-thing's on my nose and being all tickly.
• Fergie, will.i.am and some guy named Polow are on the cover. Apparently, there's a big story inside about the making of "London Bridge".
• I can't wait.
• Think that's pronounced like how Lori Petty as Tank Girl said, "Pa-Paw"?
• hmmm, I haven't seen Tank Girl in awhile. It is a good time.
• I wonder if my crew would check out the books?
• Are the books even still in print? I know for awhile they were real hard to find?
• Aw, one of my regulars just came in. He's got the day off b/c of a migraine.
• And that's when the small shreiking child arrived.
• Oh, and Fergie's got a tiara.
• Does Fergie the Duchess get to wear a tiara? Are there rules about that sort of thing?
• I bet there are.
• This picture of The Fray looks like it was Be A Model day at the local mall.
• Merivale Mall? Does anyone but me even remember those books?
• I just ordered the first Tank Girl. We'll see how well it goes.
• And the 3rd Barry Ween, which we for some reason don't have.
• When did Dane Cook become a big time celebrity?
• Does it have anything to do with Jessica Simpson not being as big a draw now, when Employee of the Month needs her, as she was even 2 months ago? Or did he hit before then?
• See, this is why the library needs to pay for me to have cable--so I can know these things. And it'd be cheaper than buying me a computer and internet.
• Bo Bice's pictures always kind of annoy me. He keeps shooting for Magnum and just not making it.
• Speaking of which, Melissa? Is my copy of Zoolander still at your house?
• Ever notice how, from some angles, Fergie looks like a bad mix of Taylor Dane, Tara from "Buffy", and the puppet that used to be on Solid Gold?
• 
• (The puppet is the one in the middle.)
• How come everytime I type "puppet" I typo "pupper"?
• I looked for a Fergie pic, but the bitch looks different in EVERY. SINGLE. PICTURE. It's kind of uncanny.
• Oh, Jordan Catalano, you are so pretty. This is an especially nice picture.
• Kelly Clarkson is shilling for Vitamin Water, or, as I like to call it and all its ilk, Grown-up Kool-aid.
• I'm just not a Scissors Sisters fan. Too much like Elton John for me, I guess.
• Ludacris gets 6 Questions.
• Stace, you wanna share your Luda story?
• Anyone else think JoJo looks like Lindsey Lohan would have if she had been allowed to grow up non-fucked up?
• Aw, Jane Wiedlin is so the most adorable thing ever.
• I think Billy Idol would look a lot less rough if he'd stop trying to still dress and style his hair as though he was still in his Generation X days.

I don't hate them but I know them.

Special shout-outs to Marissa who, after much hilarity and reference-desk-adjacent Stone Temple Pilots singing, burned me a copy of The Crow's soundtrack. Now we just have to buy the damn movie for the library...
Billboard October 7.

• Ray Charles is on the ad cover; Diddy's on the real one.
• Seems a bit backwards to me.
• Anyone else watch "Heroes" last night?
• I'm very quickly becoming addicted to that show.
• Even if Jess was totally a whiny little bitch last night.
• And trying to figure out the logistics of Ikin makes my brain hurt.
• Because, yes, I think too much about these things.
• You know what else I think too much about? This picture here of Justin Timberlake.
• He seems to be hatching his face from a disco ball.
• Add a little eyeshadow and lose that milk mustache, and he looks just a few coke binge/orgies away from throwing Toni Collette over for Ewan MacGregor.
• I do like "Sexyback" though. It's ridiculous.
• Apparently, rock stars are planning tv show's soundtracks now.
• On an upcoming "Laguna Beach", Chris Carrarararaba (bad news) has chosen, among other things, "Lloyd I'm Ready to be Heartbroken" (good news).
• We replace the flesh, which is weak, with steel, which is strong.
• Li'l Steven's using his column to talk up Seymour Stein.
• OK, no one is going to be at all surprised by what I'm about to say, but
• The founder of Touch and Go Records is cute!
• Oh, and speaking of Chicago--Raedy, if you're reading this, go read Guitar Girl by Sarra Manning. It's very cute. You'll like it; the main character sings songs about Hello Kitty, art school boys (it's British), and writing a boy's name on her stomach.
• But, back to the cute boy, we all know I'm just a sucker for the heartbroken-seeming, music-obsessed, writerish boy with a good head of hair stereotype, don't we?
• I just don't get many of them down this way...
• Oh, Christ, Puffy/Diddy/I Don't Care is back.
• I guess he couldn't find anyone else to exploit, so he had to release another one of "his own" albums.
• Dre and Snoop are also working together again.
• This is all because I've been listening to the Crow soundtrack right? All this mid90s shit.
• Speaking of, I'm totally bringing 90s Trivial Pursuit this weekend. It's on!
• New ...and You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead album includes a cover of "Gold Heart Mountaintop Queen Directory".
• Which I now, true to form, am singing in my head.
• I'm totally ordering the new Killers album.
• My collection development technique is unstoppable!
• hunh. That sounds pretty awesome. Maybe I should make a shirt.
• Or have a new email signature or MySpace headline or something.
• There's a new Beck, and there's some guy over by the videos who isn't answering his damn phone.
• Emmylou Harris needs to go wigshopping. Maybe she can take Whitney and Jessica with her.

Scenes from a class visit.

Some notes from a week of visiting ninth grade classes:
Ask who watched the premiere of Heroes earlier that week. It will help you identify any fanboys you don't already know*. Quickly mention that a large part of why you watched the show was because Jess from Gilmore Girls was in it.
If you have strong opinions about the Jess/Dean/Logan debate, this would be a good time to bring them up. Feel free to reward with candy those in the group who share your opinion.
Feel kind of weird that you have to explain to the teacher the general synopsis of the show, as you feel like you haven't been able to escape its PR campaign for the last month or so. Wonder if the teacher's been living under a rock, or just doesn't pay attention to popular culture, or network tv. Realize after the fact that you should have offered her candy for asking a question.
Be sure to mock any and all regular members of your crew (including any running jokes from, say, your anime club) who happen to be around. Not because you're mean-spirited, but because you honestly suspect they'd wonder what was wrong if you didn't. Also, if a patron has checked out a book you wanted to read, pretty much under your nose, bring that up too. You're allowed to pout and/or be sarcastic.
Don't just pay attention to what the internet is telling you about teens and immergent technologies/entertainment deliveries. You've got a captive audience and are offering candy (you are offering candy, right?) for opinions. What do these kids think about Jackass? Downloading tv shows from iTunes? Do they care? And isn't that why god invented YouTube, anyway?
If someone tells you they've read a book a movie was based on, ask which they liked better. Ask why. Don't judge if they liked the movie better.
If you've got Laffy Taffy, why not ask a student to tell you a joke in return?
Especially if your library is in a one-video-store town, be sure to mention how much cheaper your library is for movies, compared to said video store. Also mention that you order just about all the new releases, a bunch of older stuff, and will most likely order what patrons suggest. Talk as much shit as you'd like about how better your library is than the video store. Because, let's face it, you should be. If you work at the sort of library that doesn't order new releases on DVD and older stuff, especially anime, horror flicks, and other teensploitation, what the hell is wrong with you? Seriously! Why are you even bothering to do class visits if you aren't ordering popular movies?
Find out how many books you have at your library. They really like to ask that one.
If someone asks you what the meaning of life is, you say 42. You have just been tested.
Secretly, you are allowed to get annoyed by teachers judging what their students have read. Just try not to show your displeasure when the teacher says, for example, they'd rather a student was reading about Hannibal-who-invaded-with-elephants than the Lecter one. Kick yourself when you realize you had the perfect excuse to trot out your "my vice-principal was in that movie" story.
If someone asks you what you've been reading, and it happens to be 30 Days of Night**, warn the squeamish in the class about the gore.
Before throwing candy around any classroom, be sure to warn students of your terrible aim and the fact that you throw like a girl. Also tell them to duck. Laugh along with everyone else when the girl who wasn't paying attention gets beaned by a left-over summer reading sucker. Apologize too, though.
Yell at everyone to pay attention when you give the hours of the library, because you hate pulling out the "our system automatically shuts off in 5 minutes" bit.

*Not surprisingly, I'm pretty familiar with my area's fanboy population. We can smell our own. At some point, I began avoiding booktalking Joss Whedon-related works, because of my tendency to nerd out and alienate the class.
**Fucking amazing.

Only compared to some.

Billboard September 23

• The man on the advertisement cover is, I'm assuming, some very soulful, emotional singer.
• However, this is what he looks like he is thinking:
• "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."
• It's just not a good day without a Princess Bride reference, is it?
• Unless, that is, you have no guacamole.
• Which, in my world, is pretty damn tragic.
• But then, I'm also kinda hungry right now.
• You know what I really hate about Firefox? I can't alt-tab between tabs.
• Or can I?
• How do I do that?
• The Killers are on the real cover.
• It's very grainy and looks as though it's lost a few copier generation-image quality type things.
• What's 'at called again?
• One of them looks kind of like Jack Fairy.
• Two of them are wearing vests.
• The one that sometimes looks like a drummer I made out with once doesn't look like him.
• None of them are attractive.
• And, no, David, it's not just about the beards.
• Rod Stewart's wearing a vest, too!
• It's an infestation.
• No...
• wait for it...
• It's an inVESTation!
• Heh--I'm so witty.
• And not really a fan of the vest, either.
• Exceptions made for in sweater form.
• At some point, I'm totally going to finish that sweater vest I've been working on. I swear.
• I'm thinking, incidentally, that the current sweater (that lace-leaf one)needs a name matching the cats' names.
• It's certainly shedding like one of the jerks, except green.
• It's also coming along quite well.
• aaaah, Anton Corbijn took the cover picture.
• That explains the graininess.
• I didn't even recognize Axl Rose in this picture.
• I did, however, hear "Knocking on Heaven's Door" this morning.
• And "Hey Jealousy", but that's a whole 'nother thing.
• Beyonce's licensing herself to a phone game.
• I hope it's like that old Barbie video game where you help her get dressed.
• I told some high school kid about The U.S. vs. John Lennon the other day at the school, so I feel like I've done my Beatles duty for the month.
• You know, the Killers are definitely less skinny than they used to be, but they don't look puffy at all.
• I approve of that.
• You listening, DiCaprio?
• I wonder what the Killers are like live; if they're a good time or just their albums, redux.
• Goddam, I hate you, Coldplay.
• Bob Seger's back.
• Berry went into the studio with the rest of R.E.M.
• I don't know how I feel about this.
• I mean, I had kind of washed my hands of R.E.M.
• Like Wilco, they're allowed to grow and change musically, but I'm allowed to prefer their older stuff.
• I just ordered some patrons to go get me some Dairy Queen.
• No dice.
• Ingrates.
• Beyonce looks like she was part of last night's America's Next Top Model challenge on the cover of her album.
• With the crazy wigs?
• This new ad has showed up in the Billboard classifieds under legal services.
• "FATHER'S RIGHTS!!" Phone number: 312-356-DADS.
• yup.
• Someone please buy Whitney Houston a new wig.