You're melting snow angels all over town.

We had several snow days awhile ago and I got projects finished.


I finally stretched out and blocked the finished Argosy scarf from Knitty I made for a family friend in Paton's SWS. Pretty yarn, splits a lot, needs a crap ton of blocking. But very squishy and nice colors.


That thing underneath it is my Target stuff the college kids don't want sale ironing board. Cute, hunh?

I also decided that I hated the collar on Teva Durham's Lace Leaf Pullover, so I cut it out, picked up a bunch of stitches, and made a better collar. This is scratchy and warm Lamb's Pride Bulky, so I probably won't wear it quite as much as some other things, but I still really like it.

That wet spot is when I started to block, but gave up. My feeling on sweaters is that I beat them up so much, they kind of stretch out and block just from that. Or, I'm lazy.
Here's a close-up of the cute leaf device:


While I got things done, Johnny made a fort:

It's not the way they put folks on the moon.

(Man, when my blogging block goes away, it really goes away.)

Um, this is one of those posts about knitting. Just a warning.

After I got all this awesome stuff from my partner in the Friends of Craftster 3 Swap (see fig. A-E), it was time to make her a thank-you. She had wisted the Knitty Nagano sakura scarf.

(I'm the stoic "model" in that picture, in case you were wondering.)

This was a pretty quick and very fun pattern. I used Pattons wool, double stranded, in Taupe, since none of my local yarn stores seem to carry much Lamb's Pride, bulky or otherwise. For the flowers, I used a double-strand of a bunch of embroidery floss I had around on #3 needles.
(Side note: I heart my 3s. They're bamboo. Unfortunately, my cats heart them as well. If I'm stupid and don't lock them [the needles, not the cats] away, there's a good chance I'll come home to find a needle in the kitchen and another in the hallway. They seem to like chewing on the non-pointy ends.)
Things I learned while making these: i-cord (on a circular), picot cast-on. I didn't felt it because: I've never felted before and didn't want anything bad to happen; my apartment doesn't have a washer; and I liked the way it looked, non-felted. So there!



Fig. A: package 1


Fig. B: Package 2


Fig. C: package 3/birthday package


Fig. D: package 3.5


Fig. E: package 4 (+ a prom glass, a Keith Haring postcard {there was an exhibit b/c he's from Reading, did you know that?}, a pretty owl notecard, and some dinosaur and sea creature sponge capsules)

And honesty’s the ship that sank this song.

I still associate fall with new clothes. And not just new clothes, but a new look. At a certain point in high school, school clothes for me became less about whether I would have the "right" things and more about what would be fun to wear.
In the late fall, there would be days I would opt to not take a coat, thinking I would walk fast enough to be warm in the morning and the sun would warm things up enough to walk home comfortably. Or, failing that, the walk up my GIANT hill could end in a nice warm cup of tea. Some of those days, however, it would be too cold for even that, and I would take my lunch money over to the thrift store. That's how I got my first vaguely-adult-sized sweatshirt jacket*--I walked out of my school, thought to myself, I'm going to go find a black zip-up hoodie, walked to the thrift store, and found one.
Right now, I have 3 sweatshirt jackets: the black, sort of quilted (it's subtle, I swear) one I got on clearance at the Gap; the boy's navy hoodie I cut the cuffs out of, making it elbow length, that I have a cameo pig pin on; and a light blue one with hearts on the lining I thrifted last year. That last one fits sort of weird, so it's purely functional.

Most falls, I rethink the way I dress. Sometimes it's when I find myself noticing the same types of clothes over and over again. Sometimes it's a reaction to, or a change from what I had been wearing before. Sometimes it's just if I'm feeling contrary.

This fall? This fall is all about the short skirts. And black tights, but every fall I wear skirts is about the black tights for me.
And heels. You know how everyone thinks short girls should avoid the short skirt/heels combo? I'm bringing it back.
I'm also declaring the following color combinations acceptable, because I like the way they look: black/brown, black/navy, and red/pink.

And, as always, lots of scarves. Look for the return of the Target $1 section child's skeleton hand gloves, working in tandem with these in black. I've been working on a chunky short sleeved sweater in bright blue yarn I bought in New Orleans (this is taking awhile because I'm trying to make something up, not just following a pattern). My next project is Teva Durham's Lace Leaf Pullover, in a dark teal (see Fig. A). And I really want to make MagKnits' Sesame in navy and white, with anchor buttons, but I'm having trouble finding the buttons in the right size. Oh, and the Gap has this chunky fair isle cropped cardigan, but I bet I can make a cuter version (ie not cropped, and maybe elbow length, which I'm loving right now over longsleeve shirts) using Stitch'n'Bitch's Fairly Easy Fair Isle as a starting point.

*There's an adorable picture of 3yrold Jessy walking down a Regent Square street in a sweatshirt jacket and cuffed jeans.

Figure A

I love the little tacos.

I got a glittery Gir shirt in the FOC 3 Swap! Thanks, Amanda!

I made a skirt! The fabric is maps. The pleats were a pain in the ass. I have to put in on/off over my head b/c I'm not very good with the exact measuring yet.



I made a scarf! It's stripes of tshirts I cut up. Then I made li'l felt guys to go on it. This was for the Fruits Basket Swap on Craftster.


New prom glass!

Little help, guys?

This is all made of duct tape. Duck brand duct tape has a scholarship contest for promgoers every year, and it's voting time.
(I work with this girl's big sister. I actually did her makeup in Becca's wedding, which is funny considering I met her immediately before sitting her down and trying not to poke her in the eye with a mascara wand.)

So anyway, go here, choose the "most likely to be a history major" category, and scroll down the page to vote for our couple.

Hey, I was entertained.

I forgot I took this picture:


And here's Justin and the happy apple I needlefelted:

This might be my favorite silly internet quiz ever.

You are pink aluminum.
Retro, straightforward and fun, you love classic

things. If they're 99 cents at Goodwill all

the better! You are moved by striking colors

and tasty morsels, and you like a

stitch-n-bitch session in the sun. Just

remember, while you're being kitschy cool,

don't get too cold. Ice cubes are best kept

in your cocktails, baby!


What kind of knitting needles are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

I wish she'd leave my sweater home.

Took this .
Added this .
Used this pattern.
Success!

PS Played dress-up
PPS Like the pigtails? I was working the Holly Golightly just before getting arrested look.

MR. F!

We're doing this Pay It Forward thing on Etsy right now where you list something for super-cheap, then the buyer lists something for equally super cheap, etc.
I just bought these:

and put my Richard Hell hankie up.
It's a terrible picture, so here's another example:

and he's taking it like a beating

Things I neglected to mention earlier.

Last night I knitted up some of the yarn I dyed, to test gauge for making this out of the pink lemonade stuff and to see how the rest looked. Plus, I ran out of baby blanket yarn and can't buy more until the SuperJoanns opens at the end of the week, so I was fidgety and hurting for a project.
I was playing with the light green and thinking about scarves to match my winter coat. Then, this morning, I remember this stuff:
.
It's basically a string with sequins spaced periodically that you hold along with another yarn so that there's a sequin every so often.
If this came in pink, I could knit it with the green and make the best disco/prep scarf ever!
Yeah, it doesn't come in pink. I'm thinking green and silver would be pretty, but not as fun as my original idea.
If anyone has any other ideas, let me know
***

veronica and i decided that you will have at least eight children and live on a farm in the south

My sister left this comment on my MySpace a couple days ago. At first I thought it was funny, but, after our phone conversation last night, not so much. Because she said that she really could see that. And used the phrase "Earth mother." And I wonder, does my sister not know me at all?
My general distaste for babies?
That I have trouble sleeping unless there are traffic noises and the occasional siren?
Etc.?

Why are there ants in the tub?

I took the yarn from that sweater I took apart and dyed it with Kool-Aid, generic Kool-Aid, and egg dye from an Easter egg kit I randomly had in my kitchen cabinet. I vaguely remember wanting to dye Easter eggs at some point, but don't remember what state I was living in at the time, so I've potentially moved a Paas kit 2-3 times, which is a scary thought.
I kept forgetting to buy batteries for my camera, so I don't have any procedural photos. I did have a great phone conversation with Tiff, though, during, which consisted mostly of me narrating squishing yarn, describing the awful smell of wet sheep + wet bunny + wet acrylic + vinegar, and the like.
Here are some pictures of yarn drying on my shower curtain rod:


Here's a picture with horribly off colors that I couldn't fix in my crappy photo-fixing program, but that show the curtain/yarn set-up well:

Also, who doesn't love my shower curtain? I love my shower curtain, and my hot pink bathroom!
I also love Melissa's hot pink bathroom. Hers is a bit more coral than mine, but kickass nonetheless.
Soundtrack for this project: Tinyfolk and a mix remarkably similar to this one.
***
Tiff finally got her holiday package, so I can show off this picture of knitted Calvin Johnson, hanging out with Humor in his Jayne Cobb hat.

Here's the front of his shirt.

the one with the waggedy tail

UPDATE! I just bought the deer/unicorn stuffie. I couldn't help myself.
I really need to stop looking at things on Etsy, especially in a week that began with the first winter utilities bill and ends with a haircut, Belle & Sebastian tickets, and a possible drive to Dayton.
Because I keep finding stuff like these things, all of which I want:

by PerfectChildren


by knittydirtygirl (I've been stalking the Craftster spinning board lately, wanting to try to make my own yarn with weird stuff in it.)

Someone already bought this, but I still feel like I should pimp this guy's stuff, because I really like it:

by WalrusRider

Man, I keep looking at that deer/unicorn thing. I do get paid this week, and it's not like I've added to my weird stuffie collection lately...

hold this thread as I walk away

This weekend was all about nothing. Did I go visit friends? No, I punked out (sorry, guys). Did I take down Christmas decorations or buy groceries? Of course not.
I did, however, do some spectacularly bad dart-throwing, checked out the DeCapo 2005 Best Music Writing anthology, and went to my new favorite thrift store. I got all kinds of great stuff that I might even take pictures of to show off here.
***
This is what I spent the biggest part of the last couple days messing about with:

A Cheap Source of Yarn!

I like things that don't cost much, and I like to take things apart. I was that 9yrold girl who knew what the inside of her taperecorder looked like, and kind of the mechanics of how it worked. And if it didn't work quite so well after I found out, well...I had still learned something, right?
So thrifting a sweater to unravel for yarn to make other things with seems like a tailor-made-for-Jessy activity, no?
Unraveling a sweater is also, really, the next step for someone recently obsessed with knitting. Once you learn how, you can't stop noticing how things are put together. This is why I kept staring at Theresa's scarf the other night at Lanhucks and why 70% of my Narnia movie conversation with Tiff concerned the Pevensies' sweaters. Once I start noticing how things are put together, it's only a matter of time until I want to take them apart.
I used a fabulous and fun-to-read (even if you don't want to take apart a sweater) tutorial by a woman named Ashley Martineau who spins and does all kinds of cool stuff.

Here are some pictures!

The sweater. It's a light blue color, in a 70% lambswool 20% angora 10% nylon blend. I bought a Large; it was $4.


Man, it was pretty outside Sunday. I did some unraveling on my porch/balcony thing. I accidentally dropped my yarn ball and about had a heart attack as it rolled perilously close to the edge.
Also, you'll notice that the yarn is everywhere 'cause it was windy Sunday, too.


The cats investigate my 4 balls of yarn (1 from each sleeve, 1 from the back, and 1 from the front).


I wound it into crappy-looking skeins (Ashley comes through again) so I could measure the yardage. Almost 600 yards of yarn for $4! DAMN.


(just tilt your head to the side, okay?)
I used the pegs on the back of my full length mirror to measure. I put them a little over a yard apart (because I figured it was better to under-measure and have extra then over-measure and be screwed when I run out of yarn mid-project) and wrapped until I counted to 100. Peter Sagal kept me company, since that fake British lady on my local NPR affiliate apparently hates Ira Glass.

Next, I'm going to try dyeing the yarn with KoolAid. Since it's a blend of sheep, bunny, and plastic, I'm not exactly sure what's going to happen, but I bet it'll be exciting. I'm planning on trying with Pink Lemonade and/or Lime, so I'm sure I'll wind up with something cool. How hard can it be?

I'm all giddy.

Look what I just bought!!


It's by a girl named Emily Martin, and her stuff is all here. I was going to buy the painting (this is a print), but by the time I got holiday $$, it had been sold. So I asked her about prints and Bob's your uncle.
Yay.
If you're just messing around on Etsy (which you should do anyway: there's a ton of great stuff), her store name is theblackapple.

I'm a big show-off.

This is what I made Lara for Christmas.
Mom's scarf and Tiff's surprise (didja get the package yet!?) pics coming. Also, my Chrismukkzah dollar gift exchange surprise, which, if I do say so myself, is pretty damn awesome.
Hopefully, everyone is having a great holiday!

a quick update

Hey, I changed stuff around at my Etsy store so that you can buy stuff with credit cards now. Also, soon, hopefully, I'll be adding more stuff I've made that you've probably seen around my house.

(an example)

I actually have standards. Who knew?

Some guidelines, theories, and equations.

If person A has a steady work schedule, an apartment, a small enough social life that there's really only 3 places they can usually be found, and a cell phone and person B has a work schedule that changes from week to week, couch surfiness, and an answering machine that still uses the robot voice, who calls who?

I realized last week that I've taken the Eddie Izzard approach to booktalking. I've got a few notes, and I ramble, and it's funny. Sometimes. I hope.
And I wear a lot of makeup, except I don't think I look like an uglier, older Pink in it. Which is a shame, because Izzard's not a bad-looking guy, 'til he gets all Glamour Shotsed.
Not to say he shouldn't wear makeup at all. Just not like in those pictures from that Bust article awhile back.

As soon as I buy a new box of condoms, my reason for needing 'em seems to fall of the face of the earth. Leading to this equation...

2 weeks + nothing = invented closure.

If an informal survey (OK, looking at people's MySpace profiles) turns up more married hipster and punkish mid20s kids than single ones in an area, does that make a 26 year old a spinster, or just someone who should start thinking about relocation?
(Don't worry--I'm still thinking that relocation is a few years off. But people should start working to get their local teen librarians fired now. Public libraries have a lot of red tape.)

(7 balls of Lamb's Pride bulky x $7) + $4.95 flat shipping + fun times spent knitting Skully > at least $50 for a cute oversized warm sweater + the annoyance of trying to find such a sweater + shipping and handling
Greater in terms of the better idea, not greater in terms of which is the bigger investment for less.
ETA: January.

Look, if you compliment me and then reassure me of your sobriety, somehow it makes it less of a compliment. Also, kinda creepy.
Scratch that. Really creepy.

The number of sexy bunny-costumed girls in a room is indirectly proportional to the number of minutes I spend in that room.

met him in a bar/said I know who you are

I have a few executive items to clear up.
***
Somehow, my car payment never made it to the bank this month. I had to put a stop payment on a check, which I'm PRAYING is the right one, since there's a bit of confusion in my register. Otherwise, Sprint and the car people are going to be mad at me. I hate it when I'm responsible and things fuck up anyway. I also hate it when the bank charges me $10 for shit that isn't my fault (for once). So, if you are reading this and I owe you a present, it may be a bit late. But you were expecting that, anyway, weren't you?
(That's for Tiff. As far as I know--and believe me, I would know--Lara is not a Perks reader. She's also more demanding about gifts.)
Speaking of presents, I'm going to be attempting to make things this year. If you're the sort of person I give things to, and have something that I might be able to make in mind, let me know and I'll see what I can do.
Some of you it may be too late for, and you'll just have to like what you get, you ungrateful jerks.
***
Tree is too big for international travel, it was decided. Instead, my small plush triceratops (I named him Fisher the other day) is making the journey. I realized what a good thing this was last night, when I decided to read under the covers. What would I have done without Tree's neck-pillowy goodness?
***
There's been talk floating around the internet lately about my craptacular Friday night. (I love how I can take MySpace, a few Philadelphia-directed emails, some New England IMing, and Melissa's blog and turn them into "The Internet".) I had this whole thing set up, we came up with a fitting insult (Log Cabin Republican, if you're interested), but I just can't carry a grudge all like that.
Unless you're this girl Meisha I went to elementary and high school with. I still hate that bitch. And you really, really don't want to know what set it off. I have few enough friends as is.
Suffice to say, should have been hanging out with one boy. Didn't. Met an asshole.

Cara sez: "I hate when guys who are stupider/less attractive think I should still talk to them as if I were some sort of polite human being. If you aren't good to look at OR good to talk to, please stand somewhere far away and don't bother me."

I say, your problem with my intelligence, appearance, or attitude is not my problem.
The thing that really kills me about this guy, so much so that I'm still going on about it almost a week later when I could be composing my literary crush list or thinking about my actual crush or something, is that, before he turned into Asshole (TM), I was making a concerted effort to not be JessyJudgemental (as he was wearing a sweater and shorts and exhibiting a Mustang logo lookin tattoo, this was HARD) and to be JessyCharming ("Look, they have little stars on the corners!").
Just one quote, then I'll go onto the next item: "Why would anyone go to the library on the weekend?" followed by surprise and disbelief at the idea of people who don't have home computers or internet access.
Ass. Hole.
Who then (sorry, I'm on a roll now and there's still about half an hour til the RunescapeRush), at a different bar, after I was all snug in my bed, visions of kids without internet access dancing in my head, proceeds to bitch about me. To Melissa. And ask for my number.
***
Saturday was a good day, despite working, overanalyzing and jumping to (incorrect) boy conclusions, and falling into bed before 11:30. 18 kids at the anime program! And I learned how to knit in the dark.
Well, reasonably well.
Now I can't decide: do I buy more of the blue cotton yarn to finish the scarf I was working on in the dark, which I think I would wear quite a bit, or do I get completely new stuff, to expand my skill set a bit? And start on seasonably to-be-given-away stuff?
***
I've got 3 days off this weekend, and if I'm not done with that purse at the end of it, someone's gonna pay.
***
I've got these anecdotes that I forget who I've told, so I'm just going to put them on the internet and be done with it. For example, expect to see the Story of the Movie I Helped Twin Peaks Adam Make at some point.
But this is a different tale. And a shorter one.
Last year, when I was looking for library jobs, I used to check out the Special Library Assocation's job listings. (In MLS-land, we call any libraries that aren't academic, public, or school "special". They're not retarded; they're just weird.) This includes jobs like Lexmark's corporate librarian or you know how at the end of Weekend Edition they thank the librarians? Stuff like that.
Fox News listed jobs there, too. There was one that was quite tempting.
For a "Fact Writer".
When I read that listing, I got the greatest envisioning, of a bleak, former supply room somewhere, with all these posters of, like Clinton's face with a slash through it or lists of what constituted Facts.
Actually, in my head, Fox News HQ looked a lot like the workplace in Brazil. The movie, not the country.

just a steeltown girl on a Saturday morning

I hate working weekends. I just thought I'd get that out there. I had Friday off, and I planned on doing all sorts of things, like a library visit, getting Junior's oil changed, changing kitty litter, etc. Then I got way-laid by The Purse and Passions.
Which, first of all, can anyone tell me exactly what Liz framed Eve for? And I love love love that Whitney is a nun now. How do you solve a problem like having a child with the man who you later realized is your half brother? How do you hold a sunbeam in your hand? I also like that whatsherface, Ethan's wife, is becoming more bitchy and soap opera badgirl, as opposed to just the whiny little bitch who feels threatened by Theresa.
Passions remains a great show, because I could work on an increasingly complicated knitting project (that was kind of a pun, b/c it was complicated b/c I was decreasing--don't kill yourselves laughing, people) and still figure out the major plot points, at least about the characters I want to know about. I don't give a shit about the "sexy" new bartender and Ivy's family.
Also Friday there was supposed to be Boy Hanging Out, which didn't happen, and I'm hoping was some sort of misunderstanding. I had my fill of stupid boy notcalling with the last one.
Instead, I went out with Melissa's Potential Boy of Interest and his friends. I'll let her tell this story, but, suffice to say, whomever's responsible for me conversing with certain members of this crew, you and perhaps your Grandma Eva owe me a drink.
I'm thinking I may leave this window open most of the day, at least until my anime program at 3, and add to it as things occur to me. It's just not a PoBaL (ooo, acronym! I'm such a damn librarian...) post unless it's 3 years long, right?
***
Also, Legs fucked up my knee last night. Seriously, it hurt for awhile after I disengaged his claws from my flesh and confiscated the ball of yarn. I wasn't just continuously bringing it up to not go off on the guy who was unaware that there are people out there without home internet access, I swear.
***
Anyway, The Purse is mostly done. The knitting part is over, with mixed results. That means that, while it doesn't look quite like I intended and I need more practice decreasing things and keeping my stitches uniform across all the rows, it still looks good. Now I just need to futz with the lining, sew up the sides, and figure out what kind of closure I want. I'm thinking magnetic snap thing. Can you just buy those?
I can't wait until I can actually use this thing!
***
More crafty nerdiness!
Over on Craftster, I'm participating in what's called the "Little Visitor" swap. At first, I thought this was an Aunt Flo reference, but it's actually much better/twee-er. In short, the idea is that you send a stuffed thing to your partner, who gives it a tour of their town, makes it an outfit, and sends it back with a photo album of their trip.
What does this mean for you? Local friends who have always thought that Tree was kinda weird won't have to worry about seeing him for a few weeks, since he'll be on vacation in New York City.
You will, however, have to put up with me showing Humor the Speech Team Whale all around our fair city.
And yes, he's coming out dancing with us, unless I find out he's allergic to cigarette smoke. I'll also be putting pictures on the internet, where all my other pics live.
***
OK, it's after lunch now. So some of you guys have spent the last week or so listening to my steady bitching about
--Ooo, fall Houghton Mifflin preview!--
this group of kids that have been using the library as their playground, despite the perfectly serviceable playground right outside the library. I even have a speech: "Don't run, don't jump down the stairs. You don't climb on the furniture; you don't throw the blocks, nor do you hit each other with the blocks."
Of course they don't listen. Damn 4th graders think they're grown. But then, inevitable, one of them gets wronged by
--Crap, the kid that is kind of consistently trouble just wandered out with a group of friends. I'm really hoping nothing happened.--
the rest of their irritating pack, and comes to tell on them to the librarian.
Which, first of all, I'm not a teacher, bitch. And, second of all, I don't care. Maybe, if she's so mean to you, you shouldn't hang out with her. Maybe none of you should come into the library AT ALL.
At least for the next 2 years, until you're 6th graders and officially mine.
Anyway, the point to all this is that one of them has taken our newfangled IM reference availability to mean that they can tell on some kid apparently harrassing them over the internet.
"He's at the library. Can you get him to leave me alone?"
Except a lot more typo-ridden than that.
***

and then I found $5

That's how I got pinkeye, sort of.
Seriously, that guy's stuff is great and adorable. And he's on Craftster in a Grumpy Bear costume.
The link's correct this time.