I work hard for the $$, so you better treat me right.

First, the scariest thing in my office:

Seriously, what the fuck is this thing? My best guess is some sort of "I know an old lady who swallowed a fly"-related game.
Perhaps I'll die; yeah when this thing comes to life and EATS ME.

Second, another tale of the out-of-touch high school librarian I'm forced to work with.
He's doing his freshmen school library orientations this week, and, like last year, I'm going and doing my little song and dance. I was early today (got confused, times-wise) and had to sit through an extremely boring, poorly executed tutorial on using the library.
Here are some highlights:

• a discussion of the internet and search tools that did not mention Google
  
• a namedrop of Coldplay, followed by an admission to a room of 14yrolds that he didn't know who Coldplay was, followed by calling them a rap group, followed by me calling out, "They're terrible!"

When I first got there, one of the reader's club kids (and a somewhat regular of mine) walked up, chatted with me a little, leaned back in her chair, and proceeded to fall back, scattering her crutches, etc. Poor girl is pretty embarrassed at this point, so I just let her be as she fixes the ace bandage on her previously injured foot.
However! Librarian and teacher rush over, making girl even more of a focal point for entire room of 9th graders than she already is. At which point, after ascertaining that girl isn't seriously hurt and doesn't think she needs to go to the nurse's office, librarian says to teacher, perfectly audibly yet over girl's head, "Do you think we should send her anyway, for liability?"
Yeesh.