wooo, MLS

*ring, ring*
--Information desk, how can I help you?
--A little chick goes, "Cheep cheep." How do you spell that?
--C-H-E-E-P
--Thank you.

I've been taking turkey pastrami for lunch lately.

The latest and possibly worst of the terrible Arby's kids meal toys.





and, just for fun, everybody look at the hamburger stuffie I got in the mail the other day:

Luna was transgendered; Mike’s a lesbian: ALA 2006 bk 2

Dude, what is it with every librarian on the planet but me and Feed, anyway?
Actually, I suspect I know, but that’s a whole post unto itself. For a book with a 2004 copyright, it came up in conversation quite a bit at the 2006 conference. I feel like I could, in fact, discuss the programs I went to by describing how and why Feed came up at many of them. But I won’t. I’ll also attempt to contain myself when I start talking about the Neighborhood Story Project.

Alex Awards Program
I went to this last year and it was really cool, so I figured I’d repeat. And I totally got rewarded for not trying anything new, because Neil Gaiman was there. I’m also terrified now, because A. Lee Martinez (Gil’s All-Fright Diner, which is one of those books I swore I ordered, several times, and yet we don’t have it) was introduced with biographical information from his MySpace page.
Here follows A Little Jessy Professional Nightmare:
“Jessy enjoys picking junk up off the ground, thrift stores, clearance racks, public transportation. Drunkdialing AudioBlogger. "I Saw You" personal ads, and making an ass out of herself. She wants to meet a round little fellow who seems to be passed out from drinking too much milk.”
And, yes, I know that the easy answer is to not have any personal information on the internet that I wouldn’t want used to introduce me to a bunch of librarians. But where’s the fun in that? I also kind of can’t believe the intro’s writer. If I were writing presenter’s biographical information for my sister, I wouldn’t say, “Lara’s heroes are people who stand up for something…Oh, also Nick Lachey,” to a bunch of teachers.
I also noted that I should really read As Simple As Snow. I wondered a bit at Galloway’s slightly awkward (I thought) discussion of his “goth” characters (you know how sometimes you can hear quote-bunnies?) with Neil Gaiman sitting next to him, but, well, I don’t know if I could discuss anything with Neil Gaiman sitting next to me. I do, however, know that I wouldn’t read a passage from a fellow panelist’s work as part of my talk, like Galloway did at the YALSA President’s Program. But then, I was unimpressed by Postcards from No Man’s Land. Oh, and for an Iowa graduate, I was impressed at his lack of Poet Voice.

Audiobook Preconference
There was a contest to be in an audiobook! You had to audition and everything. I kinda screwed it up, which I think I wouldn’t’ve done if I had actually practiced out loud, but it was really fun nonetheless. The woman I sat next to thought so as well. Apparently, we were so excited by the prospect of being in an audiobook that somehow her ALA badge (which you need for pretty much EVERYTHING) wound up in my purse. Which I discovered hours and hours later, right before I discovered that her business card only listed her school number. Oops. Hopefully, she got to the exhibit hall lost ‘n’ found. Let that be a lesson to everyone that obsessively checking for your badge at every turn isn’t just me being insane and paranoid!
There were also interesting panels, like Bruce Coville, Listening Library, etc. talking about producing audiobooks and a couple of the kids from Full Cast Audio talking about being audiobook actors, and actually doing some audiobook rehearsing in front of us, which was super cool. Clips of audiobooks played (I tried to time my bathroom break to coincide with the clip from Feed, but no dice) that totally inspired me to make a mixcd to take on class visits this fall (what song should I “accidentally” add? “I Hate Music”? “Nic Fit”? Dub Narcotic’s “Fuck Shit Up”? [joking—I would never ever do that]). The woman I was behind in the lunch line is currently working on the audio version of Traveling Pants #4 and I tried to pump her for spoilers, but, again, no dice. I’m still terribly excited about reading this one.
Tamora Pierce does this great “I’m a terrible speaker” fake-out at the beginning of her talk, and it totally sounds like Delores Umbridge does in my head.
The awesomest thing from the preconference was the discovery that New York Public Library worked with Listening Library to get audiobook clips on their website. I’m really excited about biting this idea for my library, maybe even on the MySpace page. Kind of like how Ned Vizzini put an excerpt of It's Kind of a Funny Story on its own MySpace.
Some libraries (school ones, I think) shelve their audiobooks right next to the print version. I’m still thinking of the pros and cons of this idea for the teenhole, but I kind of like it. I mean, we’ve got the hardback and paperback copies together, why not the audio as well? My crew don’t go and look at the audiobook section as a rule, so it just might work. I wonder if I could do a test run?
Cool toys from the precon: audiobooks on memory cards and these Playaway things that my library (the one I use, not the one I work for) has and I keep meaning to investigate.
Upcoming in part 3: committees I audienced at, Printz speeches, graphic novels, and more rambly “goodness”.

Yay us; or ALA 2006 bk 1

So, I was in New Orleans for a week. I've never been anywhere where palm trees grow naturally before.

FAQ answers:

• No, I didn’t spend that much time on Bourbon Street. Do I strike you as the sort of girl who would enter a bar called the Frat House, or the sort of girl who would pick a sign up off the street instructing Frat House patrons that dress codes were to be strictly adhered to?
  
• Where I was (downtown-ish and the French Quarter) there was very little damage. There were still signs, like how all the street signs are bent and how, instead of Sporadic City Stench, sometimes I’d get a whiff of mildew. Or how many bright blue tarps I saw instead of roofs as my plane was taking off.
  
• Yes, I went to Café du Monde. I didn’t think that my beloved funnel cake could be improved upon (unless, of course, it’s by Kennywood and involves ice cream and strawberries). I was wrong. I was also wrong to wear a black shirt around all that powdered sugar. And I don’t know if it was just because I had been drinking crappy-pot-in-my-hotel-room coffee all week, but—damn. Best Cup of Coffee I’ve Had In Forever. Like, the kind of revelatory coffee experience your first cup is, or your first espresso. Or when you first realize that beans from different countries taste different. And now I sound like a junkie.
  
  
• Yup, everyone was pretty psyched to see us. In addition to the usual New Orleans tourist shirts (“Don’t Make Me Poison Your Food” and a lot about being drunk) and the Katrina black humor stuff (my favorites being the ones referring to the hurricane as a blow job), there were also “Librarians Do It By the Book” tshirts all over the place.

Mostly, I did a lot of librarianing, with some blatant fanboyishness thrown in for good measure. Everyone will be pleased to know that I didn’t embarrass myself in front of Sara Ryan, despite my giant Straight Girl Crush. Hopefully I’ll be equally lucky if I’m ever in the same room as Beth from The Gossip. Hopefully I will also actually have the balls to speak to her, since I didn’t with Sara Ryan.

I also bought my very own copy of Geography Club (and had it signed!), so expect me to be forcing that on all of my friends soon. Like, at Stacey et al’s housewarming party this weekend. I’d also have kickass Brent Hartinger temporary tattoos, but there was a summer reading mixup while I was gone (actually, back when I approved a form I shouldn’t’ve) and we were running dangerously low on prizes.
I also got some good gifties for some folks, and will be guest-blogging in Claudia’s Room sometime soon re: meeting ANM.
Lots of ARCs too, of course. I’m really trying to keep track of what I read with LibraryThing. And I’m chomping at the bit for my package containing, among other things, New Moon and Vampirates. Snurk.

More pictures are at my flickr account (see the badge thing over there?) and more actual conference detail is forthcoming.

hey. I'm back. hoo-ray.

I've got all sorts of other things I want to talk about, including: a bit I wrote in my boring airport, maybe something about the whole millenials things, obviously a hell of a lot about ALA & New Orleans, the last boy I made out with (I've been sitting on that story for a couple weeks), and how those of us who work with teens avoid being Mr. Rosso (see Fig A), if in fact we do.
But I'm not up to all that yet, and I came back to 2 whole Billboard magazines.
June 17, June 24

• Cheyenn Kimball is going to have a reality show.
  
• It'll be on MTV, so I can get the full scoop from Lara, who has a sad, sad addiction to MTV reality programming.
  
• No exaggeration, no paraphrasing: we ACTUALLY had the following conversation.
  
• Jessy: You'll watch anything MTV puts on, won't you?
  
• Lara: Yes.
  
• Her (Cheyenne, not my sister) hair is doing that flyaway thing that some stylist really thinks makes thin-haired girls look like they've got a ton of hair.
  
• When really it just looks like they need some hard-core conditioning.
  
• And trust me. I know frizzies; I spent the last week in New Orleans, remember?
  
• I have to say I prefer the reality show vehicle of a newcomer to the old model of crap sitcom where, like, the main character's mom owned a club or something.
  
• Or those terrible Fresh Prince episodes where someone owned a record store so that they could have a Tatiana Ali Sings! plotline.
  
• WHO do you think should own the trademark for the phrase "bat out of hell," Meatloaf or Jim Steinman?
  
• This may just be my new favorite stupid argument.
  
• Aw, no one wants to read Street Angel (it's just sitting on our shelves, for months). That's a shame. It's a really great book.
  
• With ninjas! And pirates! And an Irish astronaut! And a mad scientist!
  
• You should read it.
  
• So, I'm having a galley of Vampirates shipped to me.
  
• I'm pretty dang excited.
  
• Q&A with Ringo Starr.
  
• So, we're all in agreement that he's going to be the last living Beatle, right?
  
• Actually, think about it. That's the better scenario.
  
• Because if he kicks first, Paul's just going to get more and more revisionist.
  
• Plus, you know I can't stand Paul McCartney.
  
• Ringo was at least on Shining Time Station.
  
• What's Paul ever done for us, aside from helping Lisa to become more accepting of nonvegetarians?
  
• hmmm, according to Li'l Steven, there may be a Kinks reunion.
  
• I'm not holding my breath.
  
• You know what would be awesome?
  
• The Kinks and Oasis touring together.
  
• Would the Gallaghers team up against the Davies, or would it be older brothers vs younger ones?
  
• I would totally go to that show.
  
• OK, partial lineup for Ringo's All-Star band, 2006 incarnation:
  
• Sheila E
  
• Billy Squier
  
• Richard fucking Marx!
  
• Shit!
  
• (for those of you who aren't Tiff, Brian, Richard, Cindy, Cara, Alison Farinacci, or me, the concept of an inner Richard Marx--much like an inner child--was a running joke of ours circa 2000. I came up with it, of course, because I am a genius. And/or a moron. Brian made a website.)
  
• So now I have to read this stupid interview for pertinent Richard Marx bits.
  
• And there weren't any.
  
• Billy Corgan is wearing a stupid hat.
  
• heh
  
• It looks a lot like the hat that guy wore in the "Get What You Give" video.
  
• Was that what that song was called?
  
• Late 90s "we're more real" rockstar backlash?
  
• Took place in a mall?
  
• Does anyone know what the hell I'm talking about?
  
• We're switching to the 24 now.
  
• Beyonce's on the cover.
  
• The tagline is "Making a 'Bee' Line for Beyonce".
  
• And I am totally not making that up.
  
• Radiohead are going to be forcing their boring crap on us again soon.
  
• So I was in this little punk apparel store in the French Quarter last week, and there were all these great shirts and hoodies with the Ramones, Bowie, Iggy, etc on 'em and the requisite few metal bands some punks decided it was ok to like, and the usual leather cuffs and things.
  
• And they also had all these Radiohead shirts in the window.
  
• It seemed a bit of a disparity.
  
• Store had a really hot guy behind the counter, too.
  
• Who would scratch their heads at Madonna partnering with H&M? Who?
  
• Seems like a perfect combo to me, especially with the cheap disposable trendy stuff she's been pumping out for the last 6 years or so.
  
• Beyonce's shoes look ill-fitting in this photograph.
  
• Oh, I guess Beyonce's decided that a bee is her animal, like how Mariah Carey went all butterfly and shit awhile back.
  
• Oh, add me bitching about Feed to that list of future topics.
  
• I hate the font Nelly Furtado uses for her logo.
  
• And anyway, if she's all thoughtful girl singer, what's she got a damn logo for, anyway?
  
• anyway

Fig A

quick list (ongoing) of sites our new filter filters

Runescape
Viz
Gurl
DeviantArt
Go Fug Yourself
Yahoo Messenger
AOL Messenger
MSN Messenger (these 3 are linked from our website, incidentally, b/c we have IM reference)
Cheatcodes
Pamie
GamePro
Rave Clothing Store
Hot Topic

Just for fun, I copied this from the filtering company:

Access to web sites that have been identified as providing inappropriate content will be blocked. This determination is based upon various content categories by the Indiana Public Libraries. If you have a question regarding the filtering policy, please see your local technology contact.


Blocked Categories
Adults Only: Material labeled by its author or publisher as being strictly for adults. (Examples: "Adults only", "You must be 18 to visit this site", "Registration is allowed only for people 18 or older", "You must be of legal drinking age to visit this site").
Alcohol: Advocating or promoting the recreational use of alcoholic beverages.
Chat: Online chat rooms, a service that allow short messages to be sent to others immediately in real time, and the download of chat software that enables the online posting and receiving of real-time messages.
Hate/Discrimination: Advocating discrimination against others based on race, religion, gender, nationality, or sexual orientation.
Drugs: Advocating or promoting recreational use of any controlled substance. (Also see Illegal)
Web Page Hosting: Sites where home page space is offered for free. These sites historically have done nothing to prevent capricious abuse of their services by users who post offensive content under multiple pseudonyms, making them difficult to track. Individual pages that have been reviewed by N2H2 on such sites are removed from this category, but filed under other categories as necessary.
Gambling: Gambling services, or information relevant primarily to gambling.
Tasteless/Gross: Bodily functions. Tasteless humor. Graphic medical photos. Some extreme forms of body modification (cutting, branding, genital piercing).
Illegal: Advocating, promoting, or giving advice on carrying out acts widely considered illegal. This includes lock-picking, bomb-making, fraud, breaching computer security ("hacking"), phone service theft ("phreaking"), pirated software archives, or evading law enforcement.
P2P/Loophole: A loophole that can be exploited to access pages which would otherwise be filtered out from your service.
Lingerie: Models in lingerie (except those that qualify for Nudity).
Profanity: Crude, vulgar, or obscene language or gestures.
Nudity: Bare or visible genitalia, pubic hair, buttocks, female breasts, etc. (See also Lingerie and Sex)
Personals: Personal advertisements, including information about mail-order brides, dating services, escort services, or pen pals.
Pornography: Material intended to be sexually arousing or erotic. (See also Sex and Nudity)
School Cheating Information: Any site that promotes plagiarism or similar cheating among students (such as by offering term papers, exam keys, etc.)
Murder/Suicide: Information on committing murder or suicide.
Sex: Images or descriptions of sexual activity. Any sexual merchandise. Sexual fetishism. (See also Nudity)
Tobacco: Advocating or promoting the recreational use of tobacco.
Violence: Graphic images or written descriptions of wanton violence or grave injury (mutilation, maiming, dismemberment, etc.) Includes graphically violent games.
Visual Search Engine: Block search engine results based on key words.
Weapons: Information about buying, making, modifying, or using weapons such as guns, knives, swords, or ammunitions.


Exception Categories
Education: Material under another category (such as Sex, Nudity, Violence) that has educational value (such as classic literature, sex education, etc.)
For Kids: Sites that are designed specifically for kids.
History: Material that falls under another category (such as Sex or Violence) that is non-fictional and historically significant.
Medical: Material under another category (such as Nudity or Tasteless/Gross) that relates to the study or practice of medicine.
Moderated: A "Message/Bulletin Board" or "Chat" site that prevents offensive material from being posted.
Text Only: Material under another category that is strictly verbal (i.e. text or spoken word). This can be used, for example, to distinguish written erotica from graphical "Porn" sites.

Little help, guys?

This is all made of duct tape. Duck brand duct tape has a scholarship contest for promgoers every year, and it's voting time.
(I work with this girl's big sister. I actually did her makeup in Becca's wedding, which is funny considering I met her immediately before sitting her down and trying not to poke her in the eye with a mascara wand.)

So anyway, go here, choose the "most likely to be a history major" category, and scroll down the page to vote for our couple.